There are currently 3 planets in retrograde:
Welcome to your Retrograde Rumble!
Alright, star gazers! Get ready to strap on your cosmic seat belts because Mercury is doing the cha-cha in Capricorn. Expect your emails to start behaving like a coked-up squirrel and your phone to develop a personality of its own. Remember, it's not you, it's Mercury! #MercuryRetrograde #TechnoTantrums
Meanwhile, Venus in Scorpio is turning everyone's love life into a spicy telenovela episode more twisted than a pretzel in a yoga class. So, if you start feeling the urge to write intense poetry or throw plates - blame it on the planet of love! #VenusInScorpio #PassionatePlates
Mars in Sagittarius? That's like a caffeine-infused kangaroo with a GPS set for the horizon. It's all about big actions, bigger dreams, and the biggest chance of tripping over your own feet. So, go ahead, reach for the stars. Just remember to tie your shoelaces first! #MarsInSag #DreamBig
Jupiter's lounging in Taurus like a cosmic couch potato, promising good luck and abundance with the same enthusiasm as a sloth on a treadmill. So, don't just sit there, make your own luck! #JupiterInTaurus #CosmicCouchPotato
Saturn in Pisces is playing the role of that wise, but slightly intoxicated uncle at the family reunion. Listen to his advice, but maybe don't follow it to the letter. Keep an open mind, but not so open your brain falls out! #SaturnInPisces #WiseAndWobbly
Uranus in Taurus is shaking things up like a blender at a smoothie bar. Expect the unexpected and remember, change is just life's way of keeping you on your toes. Or your head, depending on how well you handle surprises! #UranusInTaurus #ShakeItUp
Neptune in Pisces is offering a free, all-you-can-eat buffet of dreams and intuition. Just be careful not to get lost in the sauce. It’s like a cosmic version of ‘Inception’, just without the spinning top or Leonardo DiCaprio. #NeptuneInPisces
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