Scorpio Report

"Scorpio Forecast: Red Pill, Blue Pill, or Maybe Just the Chocolate One? - Your Matrix-Inspired Astrological Update!"

The next Scorpio will start in 324 days, at Wednesday, 23 October, 2024

The Moon moves to Scorpio in 5 days, at Saturday, 09 December, 2023

Mercury moves to Scorpio in 315 days, at Monday, 14 October, 2024

Venus moves to Scorpio tomorrow, at Tuesday, 05 December, 2023

The Third Quarter moon is currently 21.3 days old. The next new moon is at 23:32:07, 12 Dec 2023. The next full moon is at 0:33:43, 27 Dec 2023.

Hey there, Scorpio! Prepare yourself for a cosmic roller-coaster ride this week. Now, don't flip out. I'm not saying you're going to be abducted by aliens or anything. Well, unless you count your weird neighbor Bob...he's a bit out of this world. That Third Quarter Moon, which by the way is about as old as that cheese I found at the back of my fridge, is in your star zone. What does this mean? Well, it's 21.3 days old, and if we divide that by the number of episodes in a standard season of Red Dwarf (6), we get 3.55. This is a clear sign from the universe that you need to rewatch at least 4 episodes of your favorite sitcom. It's also time to do that thing you've been putting off forever. No, not doing your taxes, Scorpio. I mean that other thing...like finally learning how to play the ukulele or knitting a sweater for your pet iguana. Remember, you're a Scorpio, not a doorstop. So stop letting people walk all over you, even if they promise to wipe their feet first. Stand up and show 'em what you're made of! And by that, I mean your robust character and passionate soul, not your anatomy. In this week of lunar lunacy, remember to keep your cool. Just because the moon is showing its age doesn't mean you have to. So grab your space helmet (or colander, if you're on a budget), plant your feet firmly on Earth, and proudly shout to the universe: "I'm a Scorpio, hear me roar!" Or whisper. Or mumble under your breath. Whatever works for you. Keep it real, Scorpios! #ScorpioSeason #MoonMadness #RedDwarfAstrology #SpaceHippie #CosmicComedy

#Scorpio

SignToday Is Posting: 04.12.2023 08:12:01 (sco-04-12-2023)